Purgatory Online

Sunday, October 20, 2002

Oh, no! PETA objects to the rally monkey!

"Sharing the view that something is wrong with the Angels is animal rights activist Amy Rhodes, a spokeswoman for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals.

"Rhodes was aghast at the notion of the Rally Monkey, a small brown primate that has been dressed up in an Angels uniform and forced to hold signs that say, 'Believe in the Power of the Rally Monkey' and 'Rally Time.'

"Images of the poor monkey are displayed proudly on the Angels' official Web site.

"'That,' said Rhodes, 'is unacceptable and it's really sick.'"

Game over, man. How can the Angels hope to stand against a group that just got their asses kicked by schoolchildren?